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CAREGIVING AND THE SANDWICH GENERATION A n n e M. alw ay s b e lie v e d th a t w hen h e r c h ild re n g re w up she w o u ld p u rs u e a c a re e r as a le g a l se c re ta ry , a jo b fo r w hich she h a d tra in e d p rio r to h e r m a rria g e . Instead, A n n e has b e c o m e the fu lltim e c a re ta k e r o f h e r ailin g m o th er. S h e is fru s tra te d a n d torn b y c o n flic tin g res p o n s ib ilitie s to h e r im m e d ia te fam ily, h e r p a re n t a n d herself. B e tty R. is w o rk in g to h e lp s u p p le m e n t the fa m ily in c o m e . S h e a n d h e r h u s b a n d have tw o y o u n g s te rs — o n e in c o lle g e , o n e b e g in n in g h ig h sc ho o l. B e tty ’s fa th e r-in -la w , w ho m she is very fo n d of, s u ffe re d a s tro k e so m e m o n th s a g o a n d a fte r b e in g h o s p ita lize d fo r a w hile, is re a d y to be dis ch arge d. B e tty ’s h u s b a n d is his o n ly son. The fa th e r w ill c o m e to live w ith his son, a n d B e tty m u s t leave h e r jo b to c a re fo r him . S h e is a p p re h e n s iv e a n d n erv ou s b y the p ro b le m s this s itu a tion w ill create. O lg a S. is sin gle, in h e r fiftie s a n d lives w ith h e r a g in g p a re n ts . S h e re c e n tly h a d to c u t h e r w o rk in g h o u rs to be a b le to give m o re tim e to h e r m o th e r a n d fa th e r w ho d e p e n d on h e r fo r ju s t a b o u t e v eryth in g . B o th are in th e ir e ig h tie s a n d ailin g . O lg a is fe a rfu l o f lo s in g h e r jo b a n d is a fra id o f n o t b e in g th e re s h o u ld th e p a re n ts n e e d her. This stres sfu l situ a tio n is e ffe c tin g h e r health. Recently I attended a conference that addressed an issue which is continually growing as a social problem — caregiving and women’s role in it. The conference was called “The Sandwich Generation” and was spon sored by The Jewish Home & Hospital for Aged (JHHA) in cooperation with the following organizations: the National Council of Women of the United States, the National Council of Jewish Women — New York Sec tion, and Older Women’s League of Manhattan. The conference was held at the Jewish Home & Hospital for the Aged in the Bronx and drew an impressively large number of participants — women and some men. The JHHA, an excellently maintained facility, was the per fect setting for such a conference. Ever aware of the presence of the Home’s frail residents the topics of aging, the responsibility for the aged and the role of women as caregivers were discussed. What exactly is the “sandwich generation”? The term applies to a generation of women who find themselves in the middle — still tied to the problems of grown child ren and having to cope with aging parents. In retro spect, little was said at this conference about the prob lems of caring for children. Obviously such care is different than that of the aged. Children represent the future and though many times they are troublesome, their development brings endless fascination and joy. The care of a loved parent or relative who has entered the last stages of his or her life, is often a painful and frustrating ordeal. In our society women have always been the primary caregivers. As a matter of fact, 85% of caregivers are women. Until quite recently the care and responsibility for the well-being of the family was the only job of the majority of women in this country. At present, the prim ary caregivers in the family tend to be spouses and daughters, then sisters, daughters-in-law and nieces. In a 1982 federal government study of 6,400 people sur veyed 33% said they received help from a daughter as compared to 17% who said they got help from a son. Caregiving, particularly care for aging parents is a “gender-assigned task”, according to Elaine Brody, an expert on aging at the Philadelphia Geriatric Center. Today many more people, particularly in this country, are living well into their eighties and nineties. At these ages the risk of long-term illness is increased, as noted in a study published by the Population Reference Bureau, a non-profit educational organization. The re port, released in 1985, estimates that 6.6 million Ameri cans 65 years old and over need extended care; of these 1.4 million are in nursing homes, and the rest are cared for within the community. Although numerous articles have been written on caregiving, “The Sandwich Generation” conference was the first attempt to focus on this issue within a women’s forum. Betty Friedan, author of “The Feminine Mys tique” and a pioneer in the feminist movement was the keynote speaker. In her usual brusque and outright manner, Ms. Friedan stated that she did not like the name “sandwich generation” which “labels women and allows the new problems of aging to be put on the backs of women in the old way”. Ms. Friedan cautioned the audience not to lose sight of the fact that “we as women have defined our problems and we will choose to raise our children and care for our parents, but in order for us to make these choices, there must be changes in society”. The “hail and brimstone” feminist advocate, who re cently celebrated her 65th birthday, is now involved in studies on aging and says she looks on aging as a “new process of developing”. Ms. Friedan posed questions such as: why do women so much better than men in survival and why they age better. She surmised that it is because women “have some life-affirming strengths which may have come from their traditional roles of car ing; these strengths are not defined, yet may have 28 ’’НАШЕ Ж ИТТЯ”, ЛИПЕНЬ/СЕРПЕНЬ 1986 Видання C оюзу Українок A мерики - перевидано в електронному форматі в 2012 році . A рхів C У A - Ню Йорк , Н . Й . C Ш A.
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